let's go to war to make peace,

[atthemercyof]

[ Locked to oldcardigans ]

[ Erik would be something nonchalant if not for the way he stands just beyond the front steps, arms crossed over his chest, gaze slanted at Agent MacTaggert. Her departing pleasantries are more directed at Charles, because Erik very clearly excudes distrust, and even distaste, to any of the Suits. But that doesn't mean his presence is not very much there. The conversation through the night weights itself down at the back of his mind. Too many people are showing an interest now, invasive little questions that get passed off as pleasantries from someone Charles trusts.

Erik sometimes wonders if Charles would just let the government steamroll right on other him. He hopes MacTaggert knows Erik won't allow that as long as he's here.

He tips his head a fraction in acknowledgement of her goodbyes, lifts his gaze skyward slightly, because there's something ticking away in the house tonight, a static kind of unease that crawls under his skin. It's a bit like the dark roll of sky just before a storm as dark eyes follow the movement of the man in front of him. ] Well?

Comments

[oldcardigans]

[ Fingers sliding down to pinch the bridge of his nose, dropping and taking an unconscionably large drink. ] I'm sorry. [ Not for what he believes, but that they end up here so often. ] I got overly defensive. I'msorryI'msorry

[atthemercyof]

Don't apologise to me. Your autonomy is important, Charles. I'm not asking you to stop thinking like yourself, I'm just - . [ He doesn't want to watch the children, watch Charles, be rounded up if this gets out of hand. ] I don't trust them, I won't. I'm just asking you to be cautious, that's all, all right? That's all I want.

[oldcardigans]

Yes. You have my word, Erik. [ Reduced to the base tenets of their hopes in this, it's easier for Charles to talk of what they do agree on. Protecting one another, namely. ] And I hope you understand that if that ever does come to pass, I won't stand by and let it happen. I'm not looking to jeopardize anyone. You don't have to trust them if you don't want to.

[atthemercyof]

[ Silent for a moment before his voice filters back. ] All right, then. As long as you're prepared.

[oldcardigans]

[A degree of wryness to it. ] What's enough?

[atthemercyof]

I'm afraid I don't know. The tides change, I just want us above water.

[oldcardigans]

[ Gaze dropping to his lap, he can see and feel all the directions he's strung up and pulled into. ] I'm not going to make it at the expense of peoples' lives.

[atthemercyof]

Just as long as you don't expect it to be at the expense of yours.

[oldcardigans]

[ A short, rather telling silence, then - ] If it can be helped.

[atthemercyof]

Charles - [ Terse for a moment. ] You're important.

[oldcardigans]

Only because I chose this. [ Leaning over to refill his glass, movements stiff. ] It could just as easily have been someone else, Erik. I'm not saying I can't do some good with where I am, or that I'm disposable, but if there's something I can do to keep lives from being lost, I'm going to do it. And you need to let that happen.

[atthemercyof]

No. [ Erik's end of their connection fizzles slightly, folding in on itself for a moment. ] If it came to be you or them, I wouldn't hesitate.

[oldcardigans]

[ Charles' consciousness flickers, pushes more firmly to Erik's. ] I have no desire to leave you. My intentions don't have to mean I'll sacrifice myself, but I'm going to do all in my power to spare innocent lives.

[atthemercyof]

[ He really needs some sort of sprinkler system he can twist when he feels like it. ] You're worth more than you realise.

[oldcardigans]

[ Fingertips digging into the meat of his leg, he wishes Erik hadn't taken that damned walk. ] I don't have a death wish, love. I'll still be with you when this is over.

[atthemercyof]

[ He knows that promises like that can't be made. Erik senses the war on the horizon. But his thoughts are quiet, dark things he chooses to ignore. ] All right,

[oldcardigans]

[ Charles is very aware that his hopes often outreach his capability to give his promises any sort of reality, guilt eating away at the base of the firm resolve he holds. ] Please stop by when you're done with your walk. I - just, when you can.

[atthemercyof]

[ Erik heaves a sigh, flits the coin back into his pocket and glances towards the dark house. This place holds so much for him, but it's nights like this that he wonders if hoping to keep hold isn't futile.

Turning, picking the path back. ] I can feel your worry all the way down here.

[oldcardigans]

Then you won't be surprised to hear I've gotten into my good brandy. [ The humour falls flat, the colour of his thoughts shifting in muted tones, wanting to take comfort from Erik when he hasn't done anything to warrant it. When he speaks again, it's quiet, almost despairing of his own tendency toward selfishness and selflessness. ] I hate fighting with you.

[atthemercyof]

Clearly you must, if I'm driving you to drink. [ Briskly crossing the grass, head down. ] I'm not too fond of it myself.

[oldcardigans]

I realize we have our differences, but must it be so - [ A sigh shakes the connection, Charles turning his glass around speculatively. ] - distressing. The circumstances seem to get the better of me.

[atthemercyof]

We have strong ideals, it can't be helped. Let's just - it will keep for tonight, yes?

[oldcardigans]

[ Willing away this awareness of the future that stubbornly pricks his insides is difficult, but it doesn't stop Charles from wanting that ignorance, just for a few hours. ] Anything, yes.

[atthemercyof]

[ Drawing the front door closed behind him when he enters, shedding his jacket from his shoulders and hanging it up. Erik pauses, draws in a breath slowly, movements now unsure. ]

[oldcardigans]

[ Reflexively reacting to the ripple in his perception signaling Erik's return, Charles drains what's left in his glass and gets his feet under him, moving to the hallway with the night's anger and defensiveness largely blunted, shoving it behind a stoic wall meant to keep his regret equally at bay. ]