let's go to war to make peace,

[atthemercyof]

[ Locked to oldcardigans ]

[ Erik would be something nonchalant if not for the way he stands just beyond the front steps, arms crossed over his chest, gaze slanted at Agent MacTaggert. Her departing pleasantries are more directed at Charles, because Erik very clearly excudes distrust, and even distaste, to any of the Suits. But that doesn't mean his presence is not very much there. The conversation through the night weights itself down at the back of his mind. Too many people are showing an interest now, invasive little questions that get passed off as pleasantries from someone Charles trusts.

Erik sometimes wonders if Charles would just let the government steamroll right on other him. He hopes MacTaggert knows Erik won't allow that as long as he's here.

He tips his head a fraction in acknowledgement of her goodbyes, lifts his gaze skyward slightly, because there's something ticking away in the house tonight, a static kind of unease that crawls under his skin. It's a bit like the dark roll of sky just before a storm as dark eyes follow the movement of the man in front of him. ] Well?

Comments

[oldcardigans]

[ Swiftly flushed with confusion, he looks back up. ] For having a fight? Dear me, no. [ To Charles, it's more about touching something of Erik's that isn't the man himself, unsure of just where he stands with Erik, left wrong-footed by this business of conflicting ideals. With their time running down, the clashes will happen frequently and violently, combing over the same points until both are wretched with exhausting their arguments. It will change only when the circumstances do, when events lurch forward, and Charles isn't prepared for that.

Awkwardly. ] You didn't think I'd really...

[atthemercyof]

[ Erik wouldn't have blamed him. He's unpredictable and sharp with his feelings. If he were Charles, he would have been cautious himself. Erik never plans to hurt him, but his actions always seem otherwise.

As it is, he's at a loss for what to say, mouth twisting. ] You might.

[oldcardigans]

[ Dropping his hands into his pockets with shoulders rigid again, there's a part of Charles that wearies of his loyalties being questioned time and time again, as though he were given to flight from the first word that passed between them. ] Sporting of you.

[atthemercyof]

[ Closing his eyes as he exhales. ] What do you want me to do here, Charles?

[oldcardigans]

[ The words come too quick to stop the sharpness. ] To not treat me as though I'd throw you out for so much as looking at me wrong, for starters. I wanted you here with me, because we can't let go or apologize for what we think, but we're able to make this work in spite of it, but I can't -

[ At times, it's strangely like he's the only one of them that's in on it, that maybe Erik's whipsawing back and forth shouldn't have affected them, but does regardless, throwing their relationship into question where it had been unassailable. Charles thought it had. Sounding a little like defeat, Charles has had his fill of conflict tonight. ] What I want has no bearing if it isn't what you want.

[atthemercyof]

I don't mean to. I just assumed. Perhaps the bracelet makes you feel held down, I would understand if you needed to be free from it, or me, for a little while.

[oldcardigans]

I didn't ask you back here to belatedly reject your gift, Erik. [ It's quieter, a bit sad without the fortifying defensiveness laying underneath it. ] It's quite the opposite, actually. I thought it might help me keep you.

[atthemercyof]

[ Holding out a hand, biting back the sigh. He doesn't mean for this to happen, and he can feel the upset rolling off Charles. ] Come here.

[oldcardigans]

[ Indecisiveness rankles him for all of a second before Charles takes it, stepping smoothly into Erik's space with the aid of the base magnetism that doesn't seem to dim for their friction, part and parcel with Charles' dear need to be near him. ]

[atthemercyof]

[ Erik catches his hand, runs his thumb along his fingertips before curling them together, holding on like it's the only thing he has. ] I'm sorry.

[oldcardigans]

[ Charles fits himself tightly against him and holds fast, finally sinking past the tinge of bitterness that he hasn't managed to cover up. ] I was a prat, too.

[atthemercyof]

[ Resting his chin atop Charles' head, taking a deep breath. ] We're evenly matched in that at least. [ Turning his cheek slightly. ] We're going to argue, Charles, I'm sorry, but we are. You are very dear to me, you must hold to that even when it feels like there is nothing more than this mission.

[oldcardigans]

I know. [ Arms tightening around him. ] And it makes this feel impossible sometimes, but I'm trying to reconcile so much of what could happen that - I'm sorry. I'm not going to force a choice. I'm going to find a way for us to get through the mission, I promise.

[atthemercyof]

Not alone. [ Breathing in his scent now that they're this close, skin still thrumming with pent up energy. ] We do this together.

[oldcardigans]

[ It's a nice thought, Charles notes, the first one he's had tonight and from his very own eternal pessimist, but tucked into him and knocked off his feet with the emotional drain and overwarm with Erik and brandy's influence, he settles for nudging Erik's neck, willing to believe him just now. ] I'd like that.

[atthemercyof]

[ Drifting his fingertips through Charles' hair, content to hold him even though they're out in the open, fraught from the way this war is going. ]

[oldcardigans]

[ With a soft sigh, he's slowly relinquishing the armour of combativeness, his hands find Erik's spine, molding into the shape of it, giving some of the comfort he's receiving back. ] It doesn't burn you to coddle a horribly optimistic thing like me?

[atthemercyof]

[ Brushing his lips across Charles' temple. ] I'd be a lot happier if your innocence didn't have to be tarnished, Charles. Believe me, I'm not trying to be cruel. I just want to know you're going to be safe.

[oldcardigans]

There are much worse ways to ruin it, I think. [ It's not gone; tempered, maybe, as he grows older and finds ways to keep his ideals intact, and without them his humanity wouldn't be as strong, he might not have saved Erik. ] I didn't mean to frighten you. I know what it would do to you if couldn't come back for you.

[atthemercyof]

Mm. [ He's fairly certain he's fallen far enough that the world wouldn't stand if they took Charles from him. ] We shouldn't waste this with arguments.

[oldcardigans]

There's merit in talking on it, but we do appear to be entrenched. [ Stroking down his back. ] I'd much rather beat you at chess than an argument, my friend. There's less blood spilt with one than the other.

[atthemercyof]

[ Eyes closing for a moment, his voice quiet. ] Really now? Because I thought they got rather heated.

[oldcardigans]

[ Charles makes a noncommittal noise and leans back to kiss just beneath his ear. ] Some good things have come of them.

[atthemercyof]

[ Smoothing his hands down Charles' sides. ] Mm. Not denying that.

[oldcardigans]

[ Rocking back on his heels, anchored to Erik's waist. ] Regardless, know that I'm very thankful to have you. Even if you do abuse your rooks to my dismay.